Hello! Well, in the last two weeks, after reading some things and praying a lot, I have realized that ultimately my focus needs to be in two places: taking life one day at a time and purposing to be less selfish and more others-centered. If I am able to do these two things, I will be encompassing all of my good character goals.
Day by Day: this has always been a challenge for me, because I'm a planner!! I like to know what's coming, be in control of it, and have that controlled plan laid out way in advance. My heart is still learning how to accept the truth that only God knows what is going to happen to me today and tomorrow. My human planning and control only extends so far... the rest is up to Him! I have purposed in the last couple of days to solely focus on the day at hand, leaving the rest to God, and it has been so freeing. Of course, certain things call for advanced planning (i.e. moving - the focus of our life right now) but even that can be done with the mindset that things might not go *exactly* as planned, so flexibility is always key. When I simply focus on the day that I'm currently living through, I am more aware of my attitude and my choices. This awareness is definitely not a guarantee that everything will go smoothly, but if my attitude is in the right place - focused on God and His promise to guide me through every turn in life - then the day still ends on a good note. :)
JOY: the typical acronym that children, brought up in church, learn when talking about selfishness, serving others, etc. "Jesus first, Others second, and Yourself third." As cheesy as this acronym often seems (especially when you've been raised in the church and have heard it in every Sunday School class, VBS week, etc) there is so much truth in it! Tim and I have been reading through a book called "What Did You Expect?" by Paul Tripp and it's about the realities of marriage that many young, married couples naively overlook before they get married. [Note: Tim thought it would be a good idea for us to read this after some discussions that we've had recently about marriage. We are not having any major problems, don't worry :) but it is definitely humbling and we are learning a lot. My mom always says "You never stop learning until you're dead!" so we're just looking at this as yet another tool for learning!] Anyway, the central theme of this book is that no matter what the problems are that surface in a marriage, the root of these problems is almost always selfishness. Ultimately, if a wife is unselfishly putting her husband's needs and desires above her own, he will be more likely to act the same way in return to her (and vice versa). When husbands and wives treat each other the way the Bible instructs them to - unselfishly, with love and respect for each other - the marriage will be a lot happier.
So, in thinking a lot about selfishness and how it plays out in life, I'm becoming more convicted of how selfishness surely would affect other areas of my life besides my marriage. I feel so silly actually typing this out, because you would think that a person like me who was raised on the solid foundation of a Christian home with completely devoted, loving parents, would have learned how not to be selfish a LONG time ago. I mean, surely in some ways I have learned - I share my things with others, I don't *always* demand to have my way - in general I figured I was pretty good at being others' centered. BUT - there are so many ways that I exhibit selfishness that I didn't even realize I was doing until recently. Sometimes I fool myself into thinking that I deserve something or I have a right to something and just that very thought is selfish - whether or not it's actually true. I even came to the point of reexamining my very Salvation, realizing that I often act like I have deserved that as well - and I most certainly have not.
All this to say that I am more and more aware of the fact that I am a sinner who does not deserve the grace that my Lord has bestowed upon me, and this makes me more aware of the fact that everyone I know and love is also a sinner and I should treat them with the same grace that God has given to me. No one deserves grace so it's all the more empowering to the person receiving it when it is given. Why wouldn't I want to encourage others with the same grace that my Savior gives me every day??
One day at a time... no selfishness... lots of grace. Powerful life lessons this week.
Day by Day: this has always been a challenge for me, because I'm a planner!! I like to know what's coming, be in control of it, and have that controlled plan laid out way in advance. My heart is still learning how to accept the truth that only God knows what is going to happen to me today and tomorrow. My human planning and control only extends so far... the rest is up to Him! I have purposed in the last couple of days to solely focus on the day at hand, leaving the rest to God, and it has been so freeing. Of course, certain things call for advanced planning (i.e. moving - the focus of our life right now) but even that can be done with the mindset that things might not go *exactly* as planned, so flexibility is always key. When I simply focus on the day that I'm currently living through, I am more aware of my attitude and my choices. This awareness is definitely not a guarantee that everything will go smoothly, but if my attitude is in the right place - focused on God and His promise to guide me through every turn in life - then the day still ends on a good note. :)
JOY: the typical acronym that children, brought up in church, learn when talking about selfishness, serving others, etc. "Jesus first, Others second, and Yourself third." As cheesy as this acronym often seems (especially when you've been raised in the church and have heard it in every Sunday School class, VBS week, etc) there is so much truth in it! Tim and I have been reading through a book called "What Did You Expect?" by Paul Tripp and it's about the realities of marriage that many young, married couples naively overlook before they get married. [Note: Tim thought it would be a good idea for us to read this after some discussions that we've had recently about marriage. We are not having any major problems, don't worry :) but it is definitely humbling and we are learning a lot. My mom always says "You never stop learning until you're dead!" so we're just looking at this as yet another tool for learning!] Anyway, the central theme of this book is that no matter what the problems are that surface in a marriage, the root of these problems is almost always selfishness. Ultimately, if a wife is unselfishly putting her husband's needs and desires above her own, he will be more likely to act the same way in return to her (and vice versa). When husbands and wives treat each other the way the Bible instructs them to - unselfishly, with love and respect for each other - the marriage will be a lot happier.
So, in thinking a lot about selfishness and how it plays out in life, I'm becoming more convicted of how selfishness surely would affect other areas of my life besides my marriage. I feel so silly actually typing this out, because you would think that a person like me who was raised on the solid foundation of a Christian home with completely devoted, loving parents, would have learned how not to be selfish a LONG time ago. I mean, surely in some ways I have learned - I share my things with others, I don't *always* demand to have my way - in general I figured I was pretty good at being others' centered. BUT - there are so many ways that I exhibit selfishness that I didn't even realize I was doing until recently. Sometimes I fool myself into thinking that I deserve something or I have a right to something and just that very thought is selfish - whether or not it's actually true. I even came to the point of reexamining my very Salvation, realizing that I often act like I have deserved that as well - and I most certainly have not.
All this to say that I am more and more aware of the fact that I am a sinner who does not deserve the grace that my Lord has bestowed upon me, and this makes me more aware of the fact that everyone I know and love is also a sinner and I should treat them with the same grace that God has given to me. No one deserves grace so it's all the more empowering to the person receiving it when it is given. Why wouldn't I want to encourage others with the same grace that my Savior gives me every day??
One day at a time... no selfishness... lots of grace. Powerful life lessons this week.
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